Oh God.

Apparently, according to TLS, scores are out. My mother is trying to convince me that they're not out and this is just a bunch of people fucking with us. And she also doesn't get why I'd post my score online when I get them.

Thus far... I have nothing.

Oh god, I'm ready to throw up.


ETA: I got my score. Don't expect to see me tonight. I'm drinking heavily. I'm a fucking failure and I'm retaking in October.

Whelp... Hello October.

Yep. I'm already registered for October. Score came in today -- few days earlier than scheduled which was fine with me. Well, would have been fine if my score wasn't so low.

Alright. So, I'm sure a lot of people would be happy with a 154. I'm in the 60th percentile. But still... It's not what I wanted. I was hoping to score about 165. That's what I was testing before I took the actual test. Needless to say, I'm so fucking disappointed in myself it's not funny. I'm just feeling like anytime I try to push my life in a direction I get a door slammed in my face. I couldn't get into schools for Music History. Tried (albeit one) school for violin performance and got rejected. And now scoring so low.

I'm just... I feel absolutely lost.

♥ Thanks, guys, for putting up with me. And thanks for all the amazingly brilliant comments on my last couple of posts. I seriously do not know what I'd do without you guys right now. I really, really don't. I'm blessed to have such amazing and supportive friends. I'll hit up replies tomorrow. Right now... I'm just not up for looking at much.

I need a hug right about now. *sigh* Or some vodka.