Jan. 27th, 2010 03:23 pm
thescarletwoman: (TV // TWW :: HOTUS)
For my first semester, I managed a 3.0 GPA. I was really bloody stoked by that. Like, beyond words stoked [Especially when that consisted of an A- in Contracts and a B+ in Torts]. Even my other two grades weren't bad. C in CivPro which still confuses me and a B- in Crim... which I was actually surprised at given that my teacher had issues with my writing. I'm sorry that I use polysyllabic words and write in sentences longer than five words but it's how I write and I've been doing it for a long time. But I digress.

Still, I was THRILLED. Utterly thrilled. Went into this semester feeling good about things and ready to take on the world, as it were.

Then, today, we got our rankings.


I now feel like shit. I know I'm an over-achiever, but that's just how I am. I'm a perfectionist. And I KNEW I wasn't going to be in the top 10%, but I had hoped (especially after talking to some of my friends and hearing that we all did roughly the same) that I'd be sitting in the top 30% of the class.

Not... edging into the top half by the fucking skin of my teeth.
thescarletwoman: (TV // TWW :: Answers)
Bullet points:

• I fucking hate my extended family on my dad's side. My grandfather practically ruined Easter. He finally called after 3 fucking years. And managed to cause even more problems. *sigh* Fun times only, y'know, not.
• Watching s2 of Doctor Who today, I realised I keep having more contacts with people in that show. see picture. That was from meeting Daniel Evans last year when I saw Sunday in the Park with George. Watching 'Christmas Invasion' today... TOTALLY didn't realise that was him as David Llewellyn.
• Is something screwy going on with IJ today or is it just me?
• Speaking of WTFs... where the hell did my default icon go?
• I have comments. Will be replying to things this evening. ♥ Counting down the weeks left that I have to teach, thank god!
• I'm seeing people talking about Dreamwidth lately and it's making me sad. It just feels like more and more people are splitting off and I'm afraid I'm going to lose contact with folks. I may not comment a lot, but I do read and after being here since 2003, LJ is like my home. But at the same time, I have this odd twisting in my stomach thinking of losing more people off my flist to yet another site. Yes, most of us have moved on from HP or aren't as into it as we once were... but still. Gah. *sigh* I just don't want my flist to disperse any more than it already has. *clings to you guys*

In any case, a poll about dreamwidth.

[Poll #1383571]

ETA: D'aaaaaaaaa *breath* aaaaaaaaaaaaw! John Barrowman wants to be a dad. *melt* Makes me think of my friend Eric and his husband's little boy. *sniffle*
thescarletwoman: (Movies // Immortal Beloved :: the 5th)
Hello. Yes, I exist. ♥ thank you guys for the well wishes for law school. Now is the waiting game. So yeah, when the letters start coming in, you all will be the first to know. Keep the fingers crossed for me! *cuddles*

1. Found out today that Dr Feldman passed away a month ago. I had... no idea. And, frankly, am really pissed off at Cleland. I've been emailing him back and forth all through November about letters of recommendation. He could have fucking said something. But yeah, he passed away from ALS -- so I've lost two professors who meant the world to me in the space of 10 months. I'm just this side of a wreck.

2. Had a good friend of mine come out to me tonight. Which... was a very weird situation all around. I swear, I collect gay men like a bloody harem. Not that I'm complaining? But sheesh. And it's a really rough situation for him too and I feel isnanely, insanely bad for him. :(

3. I... might have a boy. I gave in and did one of those internet sites just to try as, well, where do I spend my time? The theatre. Who do I tend to meet there? Gay males. And while I love my harem... not exactly conducive to finding a boyfriend. So met a guy on one of the sites... and invited him to the show tonight. We hit it off really well (even with said harem in the wings and watching boy's every move. *g*) He's a year younger than me... but taller which teh girly side approves of most heartily. Best line of the night? [ profile] avengangle? Ben will get a kick out of this.
Me: I'm a geek. I run LINUX.
Him: Cute AND runs Linux? I'm a lucky guy.

So... he asked me out on Tuesday. I'm... more than a little giddy. But giddy and also really fucking depressed. *sigh*
thescarletwoman: (Christmas // Merry & Bright)
Macy's Rickroll'd the nation. Macy's FTW!

Even better? Having to explain through my cackling laughter what Rickroll'd is to my folks.

And to everyone, have a Happy Thanksgiving. I hope your time with family is going to be better than mine. What more fun then my family, my uncle, his divorced wife and their son who hates his father for having an affair under one roof?

Please pass the Bailey's.
thescarletwoman: (Movies // Naked :: Disappointed)
I just got them.

Hello Vodka.

Yep. I did worse this time around. One point lower.

Just fuck me with a sharp stick. I don't think I've stopped crying yet.

A 3.6 GPA and I can't fucking score above a 154.

Just shoot me and put me out of my misery.
thescarletwoman: (Movies // Naked :: Go Away)
Oh thank god for September. Means the start of good TV to watch again. Not that Mad Men isn't fabulous... but it's not Hugh. *g*

And seriously, I needed a good dosage of House today after my utterly, utterly craptastic day. And it really wasn't that bad, but my head is making things worse. Because we all love my head and the complexes I manage to work myself into. I just have finally started to open myself up and I mange to get stomped on. And now I feel like hiding away for the rest of the night. Oi. But I digress.

Highlight for Spoilers: All I have to say is that it was a brilliant way to start off the season. Please, can we have Cuddy wearing something decent for a change. I loved the suit, just not the fact that it was so bloody skin tight. The shutting off of cable/911 call was utter brilliance. I'm sure the H/W shippers were all asquee. *g* Summary of spoiler text: Season Opener rocked hardcore. *g*

Speaking of TV. Picked up Torchwood today and should be here by the weekend, hopefully. And out of curiosity, does anyone remember the show Early Edition?

Also -- please, people you should be watching Raising the Bar on TNT. If anything... dude, it's Zach from Saved by the Bell as a bloody lawyer. That should sell it right there. Plus, you know, Mrs Bradley Whitford is in it. Who could ask for anything more?
thescarletwoman: (TV // Vulcan :: Fuck Off)
You know what's always nice? Getting yelled at for doing your job because an actor just so happens to be an asshole and doesn't know how to keep his mouth shut.

Yes, dickwad -- you ripped your pants. Wasn't even that bad, really. When I'm walking INTO the show 45 minutes before curtain is NOT when you come up to me and shove your ass in my face and fucking prance around about it. Particularly as I have JUST walked in, am still laden down with instrument and other bags. I laid into the little cocksucker. I wasn't mean (as [ profile] rose_whispers will attest), but I was firm. And dude. The rule is: you lose a button or a shirt needs ironed, you do it yourself. If it's a major incident you tell the stage manager ASAP and she will phone the costumer.

ALWAYS been this way.

Our delicate flower runs to the director and says I was mean and how upset he was.

So what happens? Bitch-face Almi decides to bitch me out in front of the entire fucking cast. Saying how I'm on staff now and we don't treat volunteers this way. Dare I mention that at green room opening night almi says (and I quote): "I'd like to formally welcome our newest staff member, Eric!" May I mention that Eric was hired mid-July. I was hired in August.

Right. Bitch.

So. Fucking. Annoyed.
thescarletwoman: (HP // JRK :: Rocks Fall Everyone Dies)
1. Drama (of the game wankage variety) sucks. You lot know me and that I am probably the nicest, most diplomatic person ever. Let's just say I was so pissed off yesterday that even *I* couldn't write a diplomatic email telling said person off. *sigh* God I miss AAH. I really, really do.

2. Yes, I just ordered this. After hemming and hawing all day, I gave in and bought it.

3. I'm down (according to H&M and their pretty stretchy skirt) a size 14!! Still a tiny bit tight, but I'm feeling very good about myself. I'm ALMOST down 20 pounds since the beginning of May. Weight Watchers and Wii Fit FTW!

4. *squee!* [ profile] hp_summersmut starts posting tomorrow -- er... in about 15 minutes!!! I really should figure out a posting order, shouldn't I. There's some really, really amazing stuff in this round. I think you guys will really enjoy it.

5. Went to an LSAT meeting this evening and am back to feeling good about stuff again. I shall overcome you, you damned 154!!

♥ How are you guys doing?
thescarletwoman: (Theatre // Sunday :: George and Dot)
Home again... safe and sound. I will say? I will NEVER do a bus trip again like that. I think it nearly killed me. I got very little sleep on the bus to begin with and then having to walk around NYC for 16 hours? Let me rephrase -- the walking wasn't bad. What was bad was the needing to CARRY everything I bought around with me all day long.

Granted, it was a few purses from Chinatown and my cardstock posters I always get... but still.

In any case. We arrived in NYC around 7:30 am. Headed up to Pigalle on 49th and 8th for breakfast -- then hit Chinatown.

Chinatown! )

Then, it was off to see A Chorus Line. Nick got me a student rush seat and I had an amazing seat! Row D, right on the aisle on the right hand side. So when I was heading to NYC, I heard that another friend of mine (Eric Scoitto) was thought to be joining the cast once Cry Baby closed but he wasn't going to be starting until mid-july. Open the playbill and there's an insert saying he was joining the cast at our performance. So not only did I know one person on stage but TWO.

Got to see Eric briefly afterwards and he's doing wonderfully. Someone in the cast got injured and so they called him in early. Then... out comes Nick. I haven't seen him in a good three or four years and he looks wonderful. Of course... everyone is waiting for Mario Lopez to come out. I was lucky enough to get right on the rail, otherwise I knew I wouldn't get to see Nick. So after Nick and I talk, he goes back inside -- comes out a moment later with Mario. Insert pandemonium and screams here.

What happens? Nick takes Mario right to me.

Nick: (to Mario) I wanted you to meet a friend of mine from home.
Me: Yeah, I went to high school with Nick.
Mario: (grinning) I'm sorry.
Me: I know. I just had to put up with him.

And he signed my playbill (in pen, alas -- which is somewhat hard to see in the picture, but it's there!), took a picture with me and what have you. But -- I can say that I was introduced to Mario Lopez. Not too shabby.

A Chorus Line Pictures! )

This entry is long enough ... and I need enough time to talk about Sunday. Which... *points to layout ([ profile] thescarletwoman)* If Sunday can replace Ralph as my current layout -- you know exactly how much the show meant to me and what an impact it had.


Apr. 3rd, 2008 11:59 pm
thescarletwoman: (Movies // Naked :: Go Away)
This has just been... such a crap week. Scratch that, a crap year.

Seriously. Where's that restart button.

I'm actually really thankful I have a meeting with my therapist tomorrow to do some unloading. ♥ I appreciate all the offers to chat but there are times when in person is just... it's different. I've tried talking to my parents about Anj, but they just don't get it. I think it's a generational thing, really.

They see her as an acquaintance and several times when I've tried to talk to them about it, I get corrected when I refer to her as a friend. In their minds, because I never sat down and had coffee with her, she's not a 'true friend'. Did we exchange a boat-load of IMs? No. But we made a connection, and sometimes that's all that matters.

On top of that... my grandfather's in the hospital. Those of you who have been around here for a while know there's... not much love lost with him anymore. He's now speaking to us... it's been over a year since we exchanged words after he hung up on my mother after telling her twice to 'shut up'. How HE remembers it... he called THREE months ago and tried to tell mom that he fell and she wouldn't let him get a word in edgewise. Which is a total lie. But now he's ill and has been in and out of hospital for the past couple of weeks. I honestly don't know how I feel about this, but I see how it's tearing dad apart right now. He hates his father with a passion, yet he still is his father and my dad has to deal with all of this. On top of that, my uncle and the woman he cheated on my aunt with and married two years ago (her fifth, his fourth marriage) -- are now on the outs.

There's family stress. There's me not really being able to mourn the way I need to mourn.

This gets easier, right?

♥♥ in case I haven't told you guys lately -- I love you all. I honestly and truly do.
thescarletwoman: (Movies // RENT :: Roger/Mimi)
First of all: ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

That's all I can say right now. I've been re-reading comments from you guys on my writing post and am... well, gobsmacked. You guys have seriously left me speechless. I didn't post that in seeking out pats on the back and I nearly did disable comments. But...

I'm without words. I'm slowly trying to form responses to you guys so they are coming. I just didn't want the weekend to come without saying thank you. It's been a really low couple of weeks for me and the encouragment... was exactly what I needed to hear.

So in short -- here's a massive thank you to the flist. ♥

In other news? I got the first good night's sleep in I don't know how long. melatonin=love. Seriously.

Also have a gig this weekend! Huzzah! and paying too but shhhhh. that's on the dl. The conductor flew in from Germany yesterday and worked with the little chamber ensemble for about an hour. It's a baroque piece (yay BW and their Bach love)... and the conductor complimented me not only on my playing but how excellent I was playing the music stylistically. Never thought I'd say this but... Thank you Dwight Oltman.


thescarletwoman: (Default)
Mutterings of a Music History Major

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